Entertainment

If You Followed These 10 Movie Life Hacks, You’d End Up Dead

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Learning the truth about “movie magic” is a lot like learning the truth about Santa Claus. Living in the bubble of disbelief is amazing until you realize that some things simply cannot be true. For example, remember how horrifying it was to find out that lightsabers weren”t real and that people flying spaceships were just really fit scientists conducting research? That was the worst!

Still, movies exist to entertain us, and they do a great job of bringing our imaginations to life. Unfortunately, they do a mediocre job of conveying what you should not do in real life. In fact, you may have seen something done in a movie and thought about doing it yourself. Before you do, cross-reference it with these ten movie myths. Doing so might save your time and your life.

1. Katanas can”t cut through everything.

Katanas can

Sure, they can pierce the skin and do a lot of bodily harm, but cutting through guns and tanks? Please. Don”t believe anything you saw in Kill Bill.

2. Drinking small amounts of poison will probably kill you.

Drinking small amounts of poison will probably kill you.

One does not simply build up a tolerance to poison like in The Princess Bride. You know, because poison is…err…poisonous.

3. You will probably not survive a nuclear blast.

You will probably not survive a nuclear blast.

Nuclear war: it”s a pretty horrible thought, right? Well, unless you”re in a lead-lined room that”s able to withstand a giant explosion, you”re not going to fare as well as Indiana Jones did.

4. You can”t outrun an explosion.

You can

Seeing a pattern here? The explosion will almost always travel faster than you do. I suppose the tip here should be “don”t go near explosions” or something like that.

5. Bushes will not break your fall.

Bushes will not break your fall.

You don”t live in an action movie. You don”t need to be a physicist to realize that falling from a high place into bushes will still hurt or kill you.

6. Punching someone in the head will cause serious damage.

Punching someone in the head will cause serious damage.

Sure, you”ve seen the hero knock out a bad guy with a stylish punch to the noggin. However, what you don”t see is that bad guy receiving treatment for their concussion and subsequent brain damage.

7. Your underlings make for bad human shields.

Your underlings make for bad human shields.

This is just bad form. Most bullets will just pass through your henchman and end up hitting you anyway.

8. Punching a snake in the head will not necessarily kill it.

Punching a snake in the head will not necessarily kill it.

You don”t live in a John Woo movie. Doing this to a deadly reptile will probably just anger it even more.

9. Don”t jump through a window to make a quick exit.

Don

Movie glass is usually made from sugar. Real glass is made of glass. Guess which one hurts for real?

10. Ziplines make for a bad exit strategy.

Ziplines make for a bad exit strategy.

Clothing lines can handle the weight of clothes…and not much else. Trying to zip down one will end horribly.

(via AllDay)

Chances are, if you see something that”s too good to be true in a favorite film, it probably is. There”s a reason why the credits tell you not to try this at home!

Movie magic fails us more often than you”d think. Follow the links below for more blockbuster blunders.